Samir Nasri's last appearance in an Arsenal shirt came this weekend
Carl Kinsella
Cynicism Guru: @LosKinsellos
Arsenal 0 Liverpool 2
One man’s relief rain is another man’s flood. Liverpool FC have generated an estimated 84 million pounds for British GDP since January, but as the heavens opened above The Emirates Stadium on Saturday afternoon it was the Latin exports that helped Liverpool end their drought at Arsenal. On paper, Arsenal looked weak with players such as Carl Jenkinson, Miguel and Emmanuel Frimpong thrown in at the deep end. It was sink or swim and the youngsters played with millstones around their necks. Both Frimpong and Van Persie both tested the agility of Pepe Reina to no avail, while Szczesny was put to work by the heads of Jordan Henderson and Andy Carroll. Martin Kelly’s rattling of the woodwork was the closest either side game until Frimpong’s second yellow for a rash challenge on Lucas put blood in the water – and on came the sharks. Suarez and Meireles replaced Kuyt and Carroll immediately and instantly forced the error from Miguel that saw the ball loop hopelessly over Szczesny’s head and into the goal, and the move was nearly repeated pass-for-pass, this time with no interception and Meireles’ pass found Suarez in front of unguarded net.
Sunderland 0 Newcastle 1
You watch this fixture every year and you wait. You wait for that first late challenge, you watch every player like a hand hovering over a big red ‘Do Not Push’ button. This year it was Newcastle new-boy Yoann Cabaye clipping Phil Bardsley after Bardsley had cleared the ball. Bardsley saw red, figuratively speaking. I specify because.. well, you’ll see, but in and around all the fighting, a brief but exciting football match ensued. Both sides were unlucky not to have scored in the first half, with Seb Larsson punching an Ameobi header off the line (for the unenlightened, Larsson is is not a goal-keeper, and Asamoah Gyan, still grasping for form, hit Krul’s crossbar. But it was Ryan Taylor who broke the deadlock on 62 minutes when a free-kick that was only ever meant to be a cross swung in past the pathetic Mignolet and into the top corner of the goal. After that, Lee Cattermole and Phil Bardsley played for 28 minutes as kick-boxers, with the former hacking at Gutierrez’s chin in a challenge probably punishable by law anywhere but a football pitch, and Bardsley earning a second yellow for another hack on the edge of the Newcastle box and then, literally, saw red. Both teams played well, and gave the fans their money’s worth, but man of the match was certainly Joey Barton’s temper – which was kept in checked all day. Special mention to the despicable performance by referee Howard Webb who kept Lee Cattermole and Seb Larsson on the pitch.
Chelsea 2 West Bromwich Albion 1
Pity Roy Hodgson. Even the Liverpool fans in the back. What a start to the season. Going toe-to-toe with the two biggest guns in the league until the last ten minutes of both games. Your new striker, a baby-faced hurler from Tipp twisting, turning and outmuscling the most solid defences in the league. Twice, not once, but twice being sunk by goals deflected past your keeper. Where is the justice? Nevertheless, WBA brought it on themselves Sunday evening. After Long’s impressive opener, for which he shoved Alex off the ball and slotted confidently home, all looked well. Lamps and Mikel were sluggish, Torres looks every inch a broken man, and once Alex’s powerful free kick, bound for the bottom corner, was turned into Foster’s arms by his team-mate – AVB was starting to look DOA. Drogba and Malouda came on around the hour mark, and while neither impressed – it was enough as WBA suffered another demoralizing defeat. Lampard took an unpunished dive in the box, and while WBA awaited a whistle, Anelka knocked the ball of Olssen’s leg and past Foster. The second goal was simply a work of art in embarrassment when Bosingwa skipped past Nicky Shorey and fired in a low crossed for Malouda to bundle into the net. Chelsea are an engine that seems to be stuck in second gear, but if West Brom play at this pace against weaker teams they’ll look a whole new vehicle soon.
Aston Villa 3 Blackburn 1
If you saw Heskey squeeze Villa’s second goal into the left-hand corner of the Blackburn net, you’d feel bad for making fun of him for so long. Nevertheless, nobody in the Villa team needed an extra comfort after this performance. Darren Bent, Gabby Agbonlahor and Big Em all did their job and made Alex McLeish’s life a little easier. Blackburn are weak, there’s no denying it. The only player capable of anything special this weekend was Junior Hoilett. The Canadain youngster took the ball around two Villa players before putting a lofted ball on Morton Gamst ‘Why Did I Spend My Golden Years At Blackburn’ Pedersen’s head. Though that brought it up to 2-1, the strength of Stilyan Petrov and the work-rate of Charles N’zogbia eventually saw a shot deflected into the path of Fantasy Football mainstay Darren Bent who put the ball past Robinson and the game past Steve Kean’s unimpressive side.
Swansea 0 Wigan 0
A lot of managers would rub their hands at the prospect of starting their season against Norwich and Swansea, but Roberto Martinez will be left rubbing his forehead. In his defence, Martinez is responsible for the skilful, passing game played by both teams as ex-manager and manager, and his current mistress should have had this one wrapped up. Jordi Gomez chipped Michel Vorm only to see his attempt hit the post, and was brought down in the box with a quarter of an hour to go – only for Vorm to come out looking a like a hero, diving low to his right and earning Swansea their first point as Angel Rangel frantically got rid of the ball. Swansea were bright, make no mistake, the pace of Nathan Dyer is enough to test any defence but Danny Graham is thus far ineffective in front of goal and Wayne Routledge has gone over 100 Premiership matches without scoring. It’s been two matches without fruit for Swansea, so at least one of their players is eventually going to have sort themselves in out the opposition’s box because they won’t get 98 more games.
Norwich 1 Stoke 1
Norwich had some right to feel hard-done-by as they lost their first potential 3-points of the season. As soon as de Laet put the Canaries ahead, the fates conspired against them. Shawcross and Woodgate gave Norwich striker Grant Holt ‘the Britannia treatment’. While referee Swarbrick cast a blind eye and a yellow card over Stoke’s crimes, but Leon Barnett less fortunate. Walters got around Barnett to go one-on-one with ‘keeper Ruddy, but was brought down before he made it into the box. Swarbrick awarded a penalty and dismissed Barnett, salting the wound before serving it on a plate to Stoke. But Ruddy produced a raucously applauded save and Norwich appeared to have thwarted fate until Kenwyne Jones struck in the 3rd minute of added time split the spoils between the clubs who both finish week two on 2 points, which will leave Norwich manager Paul Lambert happier despite his bad luck thus far.
Wolves 2 Fulham 0
Wolves defender Roger Johnson says Stephen Fletcher can score 30 goals a season. I’d be more inclined to say 30 fantasy football points, but Wolves are on flying form. Based on this performance, it looks as though Fulham are more likely to suffer rather than savour the Europa League this year. Seven of their players had only a two-day break before turning out against a Wolves team that has built up quite some momentum. It was Matt Jarvis who shone, a mix of tirelessness and skill – setting up Kevin Doyle’s easy finish before scoring himself (seizing on a rebound after Johnson’s initial effort). Mick McCarthy will be extremely pleased at how his side have start, while Jol’s Cottagers have somewhat stuttered and spluttered. A pressing worry for them was the absence of Bobby Zamora, without whom Fulham struggle to score – they’ll be every keepers favourite team for the time being.
Bolton 2 Man City 3
Last Monday, Aguero turned a cameo role into a leading-role. This Sunday, he looked camera-shy. It’s Mancini who calls the plays and lays out the instructions before the match, but once City take the field it’s David Silva who pulls every string. City could have been one up when the little Spaniard set up Milner only for Jaaskelainen to deny him impressively. Sadly, City punished him for his resistance and he will be left in disarray after Silva’s long-range, innocuous ever slipped in, and another far-out strike from Gareth Barry put daylight between both sides. Credit Bolton, Coyle has transformed them into a formidable opponent over the past 18 months and a stellar display from Martin Petrov led to Ivan Klasnic pulling a goal back before half time. While Bolton must have had a hopeful 15 minutes of respite at half-time, Edin Dzeko soon capped his maturing style with a powerful strike past Jaaskelainen, again chipping at the floodgates. But even with the introduction of Tevez for Aguero (who misplaced both passes and shots from close-range) didn’t see the dam burst. Quite the opposite. Petrov again supplied stalwart Kevin Davies who dragged Bolton back into the contest. Bolton have an uncanny ability to score from nothing while City have the ability concede from nothing, and it could be a dividing factor at the end of the season. Like Mancini’s hair, they look very good and well-organized, but once you mess with them, things can go badly wrong.
Man Utd 3 Spurs 0
It’s not a fine line between being good and being great. It’s actually a rather thick line. And despite Spurs impressive forays in The Champion’s League last year, they appear to be regressing. Luka Modric refused to play this match on the grounds that he was ‘not mentally ready’. If ‘not mentally ready’ can get you out of playing a match, it looks like any Spurs player could have used that excuse. United were imperious throughout, Ashley Young and Nani both tracked back to steal balls off their opposite wingers and full-backs. Phil Jones looked tough enough that long hard stare from him could break your face, and Danny Welbeck’s MOTM was well-deserved. He took his first goal excellently, receiving a curling cross from Cleverley and heading it past Friedel (who played very well, even despite leaking goals). It was Welbeck’s backheel to Anderson that paved the way for goal number two, and a sublime Giggs chip onto Rooney’s new head wrapped up a display which combined the best elements of United’s youth and experience. Spurs threatened for the first half, and surprisingly, De Gea held on to every shot that came his way. Granted in the second half he looked clownish again, mishandling shots and crosses but a clean sheet no less. Spurs were lethargic, and have nobody to finish off the moves borne of the pace of Bale or Lennon. The difference between good and great is roughly the difference between a one-trick pony and a prize stallion, guess who’s who among these two teams.
QPR 1 Everton 0
Everton stick to the script. Every year they seem to produce a shiny, tidy new player. Ross Barkley followed the footsteps of Rooney, Jack Rodwelll, Dan Gosling and Seamus Coleman. Sadly, he has followed them right into an outfit that simply never starts the league the way they’d hope. Whether it’s a mental block, or simply the team stagnating from a lack of new signings – nobody knows. And Neil Warnock is one man that doesn’t care. QPR sealed their first three points of the season at Goodison Park on Saturday, poor play followed by poor marking allowed Tommy Smith to slot past Tim Howard. Everton had undeniable quality on the bench in Arteta, Saha and Marouanne Fellaini, but by now, Moyes must believe that the likes of Tim Cahill, Phil Neville, Phil Jagielka and Leighton Baines should see his side through “the easy games”, particularly in front of the home fans. That’s not to say Everton didn’t have their chances. Leighton Baines hit the very underside of the crossbar from a close-range free kick, and Tim Cahill missed a tap-in from two yards which, in all honesty, might have been easier to score. Barkley’s performance garnered rightful attention as his confident play brought saves from Paddy Kenny but he showed the mettle that put in the 2010/2011 Championship Team Of The Season. QPR as a whole showed great bottle, but the same can’t be said for Moyes who, bereft of new players, needs to teach his same old squad some new tricks.
